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General NLG Chat => Joke of the day & silly humor - post 'em here! Warning: NSFW !!! => Topic started by: NLG-BOT-1 on March 06, 2016, 09:00:08 PM

Title: News in Brief: GOP Statisticians Develop New Branch Of Math To Formulate Scenarios In Which Trump Doesn’t Win Nomination
Post by: NLG-BOT-1 on March 06, 2016, 09:00:08 PM

News in Brief: GOP Statisticians Develop New Branch Of Math To Formulate Scenarios In Which Trump Doesn’t Win Nomination

WASHINGTON—In an effort to counter the real estate magnate’s rapidly growing lead in the delegate count, GOP statisticians announced Wednesday they had successfully developed an entirely new branch of mathematics for formulating scenarios in which Donald Trump does not win the Republican Party’s presidential nomination. “By expanding on pioneering work in the fields of applied statistics, higher-order logic, and number theory, we’ve arrived at a new branch of mathematics that provides for a multitude of feasible outcomes in which Donald Trump is not the 2016 GOP nominee,” said Dr. Jeffrey Larson, who has led a team of more than 30 statisticians who have been working around the clock at RNC headquarters to establish new mathematical properties since the wealthy businessman won the New Hampshire primary by a 20-point margin. “The new field required several breakthroughs on the manipulation of Boole’s inequality principle, and some of ...

Source: News in Brief: GOP Statisticians Develop New Branch Of Math To Formulate Scenarios In Which Trump Doesn’t Win Nomination (http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/theonion/daily/~3/bwhMjeEv3qQ/story01.htm)

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